Mismatch
by psychemenace
Summary: “What if your mark doesn’t match with mine?” Hiroomi said a little bit shy while the were playing in the sand box. Little Akkey had been very sure they would match. “We would match!” Akkey flashed a smile at Hiroomi. He grabbed the raven head boy’s hand, held it tightly, firmly, as though nothing would ever make the boy think they would ever be apart ever. The gesture was like a
1. chapter 1

_It was not really a promise. It was just something that spilled out because of too much playfulness and enthusiasm._

 _"We'll be together forever_ Hiroomi _!" Little Akihito chimed wrapping an arm around little Hiroomi's shoulders._

 _Flashing a toothy grin at the_ raven haired _boy, the blond took the other's little hands in his and dragged him to run with him. Little Hiro's eyes grew wide. His scarf that wrapped around his little neck fluttered in the air as his body trundled because of the uneven ground. He grabbed a hold of his scarf to prevent it from unwinding from his neck. He thought it would, so he tightened his grip on it and tightened his grip on Akkey's hand as well._

 _They reached a post. Both were panting from running too much. With shallow breaths, heaving lungs and fingers entwined, and the cold wind seeping into sweaty pores, they tried recovering their breaths._

 _Little Hiroomi blushed. He was older by a year and big boys like him he thought didn't blush easily. But Akkey was Akkey so it didn't really matter whether Hiroomi was bigger and much older. Akkey was a dweeb, a little bit weird too, but never did Hiroomi feel like pretending to be big and mature when he was with him, except in times when he teased Akkey. But times like this when they play, Hiroomi can do whatever he pleased, thinking only of his Akkey and nothing but him._

 _Hiroomi bowed his head, covering a portion of his face with his bangs in an attempt to hide his flustered face. He still thought of what Akkey said to him. It bugged him, and so he asked,_

 _"You mean it?" despite his shaky voice and nervous hands balled into fists; despite his pride of being a Nase smoldering into ashes turning into dust at Akkey's words._

 _Akkey paused, quite surprised at little Hiro's response._

 _"Yup! We'll be together forever."_

 _When he said it, Akihito made sure to hold Hiroomi's hand tightly._

* * *

Soul marks didn't manifest themselves early. In fact, most soul marks appeared a day after one turned 14. They always start faint, just a mole like dot or a line at first on the skin, but the difference was it was painful and itchy. In certain occasions, it glows, scintillating as a burning feeling envelops the body it scarred.

Hiroomi's soul mark appeared when he was 12 years old. It was a faint line etched on his left hip. He discovered it when he was bathing. He felt something sting near the juncture of his hip and his thigh. Anxious, he never told any one about it, not even his most beloved little sister; not even Akkey.

When the mark manifested, Akkey and he had drifted apart. Hiroomi no longer visited Akkey's house to play with him. This is also the time when Hiroomi started his formal lessons of being a spirit world warrior and was forbidden to visit Akkey after what happened between them.

What happened between them caused their relationship to be strained. Hiroomi noticed that when they see each other at school, Akkey avoids him. Akkey no longer looked at him like how he used to. His toothy grin, his company and his warmth was no more, and that left Hiroomi winter cold.

Now, he didn't have anyone he can bare himself out. But he still thought of Akkey from time to time and vowed he would become a great spirit world warrior just to be able to be with him; just to help him contain the youmo inside of him.

So it was no surprise that when Hiroomi found out Akkey's mark had manifested, he would be severely heart broken.

Mitsuki told him that Akkey's soul mark was on his left hand. It was just a faint petal, like a faded tattoo written on the fleshy part at the bottom part of his thumb.

Mitsuki continued that it made Akkey look like a moron. Hiroomi only smiled at his sister and narrowed his eyes, attempting to hug her because talking about Akkey always made her very charming in his eyes.

"Nii-san, you idiot! Stop this."

When he grabbed Mitsuki by the shoulder, that's when he found out Mitsuki's soul mark. Disappointed he said,

"No!" Eyes wide Hiroomi acted like a fool finding out about Mitsuki's mark. He slapped the side of his face for a more dramatic effect.

"My lovely imouto! It can't be,"

Mitsuki made a disgusted expression and slammed the door in Hiroomi's face.

When Mitsuki left, Hiroomi's goofy expression turned sad. He slumped on the bed and closed his eyes.

"So his mark is different from mine."

The next thing Hiroomi knew, the mark on his hip got darker and it snaked up his side and curled like soft skin of a skinned leaf. What used to be a faint line turned larger and more imposing. Hiroomi ran his fingers across its expanse, tracing the outline, its shape; every curl made him wish his mark would match Akkey's. But he knew it wouldn't. It never will. So he decided to go to Akkey's apartment and confront him about it, perhaps tease him a little bit. But really he just wanted to see him after so long.

Hiroomi waited for Akihito to open his door. It was Saturday; they didn't have classes and it had been 400 days (yes he'd been counting the days) since they last talked and Hiroomi was nervous. He tried to keep calm by humming. Alternating from standing on his toes to planting his feet firmly on the ground, he couldn't stand still. His clenched hands were inside his pockets. It was autumn and a bit warm now, but he still felt cold; his hands were cold, and his mark ached currently. He wanted to erase it so that at least he wouldn't feel bad about having a different mark from Akkey; so that he could at least cling to Akkey's promise that they would be together forever. He considered this as he burrowed his head deeper in his scarf, breathing in the scent of the cloth. Maybe Akkey already forgot all about their promise. Hiroomi's cheeks turn a shade redder at the thought of this.

He knew it was foolish of him to cling to something Akkey told him when they were young. Children were prone to giving promises—promises that they would likely forget once they grow older. But despite this, Hiroomi still believed in their promise.

Feeling his stomach knot, Hiroomi bit his lower lip, furrowed his brows, and clenched his toes out of frustration and sadness. This sadness was something that was growing into fear, and as of late hate. He thought that the seconds that dragged on as he waited was tormenting. Upon the sound of the footsteps and a click on the door, the chaos inside his mind calmed down a little bit. He raised his eyes and met Akkey's widened golden orbs.

Clearly the boy was surprised at Hiroomi's sudden visit. He also felt awkward. Hiroomi thought because he was placing his hand at the scruff of his neck clearly confused.

"Hiroomi," Akihito said wryly.

In response, Hiroomi narrowed his eyes. He knew Akkey still felt guilty about what happened.

Hiroomi smirked; he was trying to be playful, to be a tease just to hide how insecure he felt. It was the only thing he could do to ward off the ache in his chest. He missed Akkey very much, this he couldn't deny.

"Saa, Akkey, are just going to keep standing there?"

Hiroomi stepped inside. Akihito made way for him, quirking his eyebrows as if saying, "You win."

"What brings you here though Hiroomi?"

"That's Hiroomi-senpai for you Akkey~"

"Hiroomi-senpai.." Akkey pouted, shoulders hunched tiredly as they walked towards the kitchen.

"I missed this lonesome home of yours Akkey."

"Are you making fun of me?"

"Of course not." Hiroomi says blithely.

Of course he did not. Akkey's apartment was the only place he could be comfortable in. And it will be the only place he'd ever feel at home.

"Cook for me Akkey."

"Hah?" Akkey raised his voice, surprised.

Hiroomi never touches Akkey, but this time he mustered the courage to. To keep him quiet, he placed his index finger on the younger man's lips. Akihito slapped his hand away and gritted his teeth. Hiroomi knew what he was thinking. He knew that he must be angry about Hiroomi doing all these things: tormenting him, teasing him just because Hiroomi had the leverage to do so.

Hiroomi felt a bit hurt. The pang of what used to be a warm friendship between the two that still lingered in his heart still hurt like a burn. He wanted to say what happened to us Akkey? He almost said it, but he stopped himself before he could.

Akihito turned his back on Hiroomi and cluck his tongue. He still obeyed by walking to the lavatory. Akihito will cook omurice for him. Hiroomi smiled and sauntered towards Akkey's bedroom and slumped down on the bed. He stared at the ceiling for a bit and then he closed his eyes; he crossed his arms behind his head.

The room smelled of Akkey. It stunk of his sweat and his perfume, also of magazine sheets and paint. Sometimes Akkey painted designs of glasses and the girls he wanted them to wear.

Akihito loved glasses. In fact, he had some sort of of fetish with glasses, and Hiroomi used to always tease him about it. Akihito would retort back how at least it was not as disturbing and creepy as Hiroomi's sister complex.

It was not as creepy as Akkey thinks. Because truth be told, the feelings that Hiroomi had for Akkey was even worse. This had always been what's in Hiroomi's mind whenever Akkey tells him his sister complex was creepy.

Upon remembering their exchange, Hiroomi slipped a hand inside his shirt and traced a finger on his soul mark.

The mark was really a pain in the ass. Hiroomi started to wonder whether these marks would really make Akkey drift farther away from him.

They said that soul marks would fully develop when one reached the age of 19 when that happens, attraction may happen. Once they see the person whose marks matched theirs, the mark will glow and that's when they'll know.

Hiroomi wondered whether this was true or not. He wondered whether despite that, can one escape this fate and love another instead? Can someone choose someone else, love someone else despite the attraction that they have to their pairs?

Wondering about such things, Hiroomi fell asleep.

"Hiroomi! It's done," Akihito called. He waited for a response, but there was none so begrudgingly, he stomped his feet and walked towards his room to drag Hiroomi's ass down to eat. It was awkward because he felt as though he was a nagging wife.

"Hiroomi! Hiroomi-senpai,"Akkey sarcastically called.

When he opened the door to his room, he saw Hiroomi's back facing him, shirt bunched up a bit, the scar on his back stretched across his back, visible, palpable.

Akkey frowned and clenched his fists. He still regretted the fact that he hurt someone; that he hurt Hiroomi.

Akkey sighed and sauntered towards the bed. He sat down and reached out to touch a lock of Hiroomi's hair. He ran his index finger through it, feeling the softness of his silky raven hair. At this, Hiroomi scrunched his face, making Akihito smile.

Akkey stared at the goofy way Hiroomi slept and smiled. He adjusted himself on the bed and looked at his left hand. He stared at his palms and studied it. The faint bulb of a flower etched into the skin looked like a mole.

"So this is a soul mark," Akkey thought. Even he, the infamous half human half youmo had something like that. He knew about the thing about soul marks, that it meant you had someone that was born for you in this life.

Undaunted, he took Hiroomi's hand to check whether they match. He took Hiroomi's left hand and tilted it so that the palm was up.

There was no mark like his. And Akkey felt disappointed. He ran a thumb across the fleshy part of Hiroomi's palm.

Maybe they were not really meant to be together. Fate commands it so. Akkey frowned. He thought that it was bad to force things that were clearly not meant to be. There were just things that even if how much you wanted it, you can never have it. And as such, you just have to live with it. He wondered whether or not this was also true for affection, for love even. Thinking about this, Akkey felt nostalgic; it reminded him of the past,

" _What if your mark doesn't match with mine?" Hiroomi said a little bit shy while they were playing in the sand box._

Little Akkey had been very sure they would match.

" _We would match!" Akkey flashed a smile at Hiroomi. He grabbed the raven head boy's hand, held it tightly, firmly, as though nothing would ever make the boy think they would ever be apart ever._

The gesture was like a promise, an assurance, and it felt permanent and true.

Akihito wondered whether or not Hiroomi forgot about their promise. Akihito never reneges on his promises. He wondered about what he'll do when Hiroomi first reneges on his.

After he hurt Hiroomi, Akihito didn't really know how to approach him again, that's why he avoided him as much as he could. Whenever Akkey saw Hiroomi, he would only remember him splayed on the grass, his bloody back exposed, unconscious, and his hands drenched in Hiroomi's blood.

Akkey wondered whether things were better this way.

None of them actually had any idea how soul marks worked when two persons finally found their match. Akihito and Mitsuki talked about it in the clubroom one afternoon. Mitsuki got curious about the whole thing about soul marks when she read a novel about reincarnation.

"I don't really believe in this reincarnation stuff, but don't you think it's pretty similar to this whole soul mark thing of ours?"

"It sounds the same. Well, reincarnation can also be related to this soul marks right? After all, the truth behind this soul mark is that in our past life, we met our match before and probably had a connection with them right? So I guess technically it's the same."

"Hmmph, I don't really see the point in this though. We develop this mark when we turn 14, and then the mark would fully manifest itself when we turn 19. And then? What if you decide to love someone before that? Isn't it strange? What if before finding your match you are already devoted to someone else?"

What Mitsuki said struck a nerve in Akihito. She was right. That was indeed a problem. What if you already decided on loving someone before you found your match? Before your soul mark even manifested itself?

Akihito gripped the cover of the book he was holding. He stared at the line of words without reading, his mind still wondered about what was up with all the drama surrounding the soul marks.

"No one ever told us how it works" Mitsuki shrugged.

"You didn't ask any of your elders?"

"Why would I do that? That's ridiculous. I could ask Aneki, but.. she seems to have a lot going on right now and Nii-san's being an asshole as ever." Mitsuki crossed her arms over her chest. She raised a hand to flip her hair.

Upon mentioning Hiroomi, Mitsuki paused and waited for a response from Akkey. None came; she thought Akkey's silence was odd. At this, she narrowed her eyes.

"Hmm, he visited you didn't he?"

"Yeah, he did. I thought he was going to ask something, I thought it was important, but he just took a nap there and ate when he woke up." Akkey ruffled his hair, then added, his face contorting as if he had enough.

"When he woke up, the omurice was already cold, so I had to heat it up for him. And you know how he is, while I was heating it up, he slipped his hand in my armpits. Ugh.. so I kind of.. did something."

Mitsuki just stared at Akkey. She knew something else happened between the two, but she let it slide.

What Akkey hid from her was what came after,

* * *

 _Akkey wheeled around at Hiroomi's touch, slapping his hand away embarrassed. Hiroomi never changed, he was still as shameless as before. But what caught him by surprise was how cold Hiroomi's hands were. They were trembling too._

He understood that Hiroomi was perpetually cold, this was a downside to his power, but it was colder than he had remembered them. He sighed completely surrendering. He didn't' look at Hiroomi, he took his hand and ran his hand across its surface.

Hiroomi just stared at him, feeling all sorts of emotions well up within him. He missed this so much; he missed Akihito's touch.

" _You are colder than ever. You should have brought mittens. For goodness sake Hiroomi," Akihito rolled his eyes, as he felt Hiroomi's hand wiggle at his side. He grabbed Hiroomi's hands and continued clearly annoyed, "My armpits are out of the question!"_

Hiroomi chuckled, "But your armpits are really warm Akkey~" Hiroomi said as his cheeks flustered. He rested his chin on Akkey's shoulder and breathed in Akkey scent. This is the limit on how close he's going to let him know how much he adored him. This is the closest thing he would ever be to saying the words, "I love you"; "I adore you"; "love me back?". It's in the way his hands trembled with anticipation; wishing Akkey would hold his hand; wishing he would turn around and notice how much he's been trying to hold back his feelings from the start.

Akihito sighed totally oblivious to the tumult Hiroomi was in. The blond raised his eyes, and narrowed them sadly. Akkey grabbed Hiroomi's hands, pressed them slightly. This is the closest thing he would ever be to telling him how much he still felt guilty at hurting him. He swallowed a lump in his throat. He was hesitating in saying something, fearing that his voice would betray him.

" _You sure it's okay to be alone with me like this? After that?" There he said it. He finally took out the thorn inside his chest._

Hiroomi wasn't expecting that from Akihito. He smiled a slight smile and tightened his grip on Akkey's hand. Gently, he withdrew, cupped Akkey's shoulder and pressed them. Batting his eyes, and without looking directly at him, he made him turn to look at him. It was really difficult to say what one wanted to say. It was difficult pouring out what you truly feel for someone without feeling insecure; without feeling vulnerable. If only it was easy to just spill everything out. But in the current circumstance, it was hard. He held Akkey's hand. This was it. This was truly it, he would finally see for himself whether or not it was true that he and Akkey didn't match. Hiroomi swallowed a lump in his throat. Closed his eyes, as if he was saying a prayer, opened them and tilted Akkey's left hand to expose his palm.

Akihito's heart skipped a beat at this. He stared at Hiroomi as the latter shifted his eyes on his palms. Akkey didn't want him to know they didn't match. He wanted to take his hand away, but Hiroomi firmly held it, like his life depended on it.

Hiroomi ran his thumb across the fleshy surface, twice. Akihito had to swallow a lump in his throat nervously. Hiroomi took his hand closer to his face to see it clearly.

Akihito wanted to push Hiroomi away; he didn't want it like this, and then it came, the words he never wanted to hear coming from Hiroomi's mouth,

" _We don't match." Hiroomi raised his eyes and smiled at him painfully._

Akihito looked dejected. He bowed his head, praying Hiroomi had already forgotten about their promise about being together.

Their destinies had changed now. Their bond was broken and it can never be mended again.

" _It's a cute petal Akkey." Hiroomi said as he painted whirlpools on Akkey's palm._

"I wonder what it would turn into when it has finally fully manifested itself. Does it hurt? When it first manifested itself on your skin?"

" _It just throbbed a lot, sometimes," Akkey paused; he almost said when I think of you without thinking._

"… _it throbbed a bit, and glowed that one time."_

Hiroomi didn't reply for awhile. Then he said,

" _Sometimes..." He quirked his eyebrows sadly, as if he's given up on something._

"Sometimes, I wonder whether I have two soul marks."

* * *

Finding one's match was unlike anything Akihito had imagined. He wasn't expecting that the mark would glow, rather than hurt, the sensation was warm; it felt like his nerves were thrumming against his skin. His cheeks felt hot and his hands went cold as he gazed upon her—his glasses goddess, Kuriyama Mirai.

He was aghast at first. When he first saw her, she was about to jump on the roof. Feeling worried that she might commit suicide, he rushed to the rooftop and declared,

"Someone who looks so good in glasses as you should not die!"

The girl stared at him for awhile and said, "Fuyukai desu." She rushed to him then, a liquefied reddish thing manifested itself in her hand forming something that looked like a sword. Everything happened so fast that Akihito didn't have time to struggle. Before he realized it, she already stabbed him straight through the heart. At this time, his soul mark glowed, and this made them both very surprised.

The girl immediately took out her sword and stared at him wide eyed. She flitted her eyes from her own hand to Akkey's nervously. Her mark also glowed. At this, she backed away and said,

"Fuyukai desu." As she adjusted her glasses and escaped, clearly embarrassed.

Akihito never understood what attraction meant until that moment. He never thought he would ever feel a connection that strong. He never thought his chest would hurt a bit because of his heart ramming too much against his chest. The feeling he felt made him incredibly embarrassed to the point that his palms were sweating and his cheeks turned red as a tomato.

So this was attraction.

He never thought it would also mean constantly thinking of that person; constantly worrying about her and things like that. And every time he thought of her, the mark on the palm of his hand would glow.

Whenever this happened, it felt nice. It felt like the warmth from his hand spread throughout his body. Such warmth was comforting. And it could ease his insomnia most of the time. It also somehow made his nightmares go away.

But then, a sense of guilt would overcome him. He would think of Hiroomi and feel sad. Sad because despite his attraction to Mirai, he really, absolutely wanted to be with Hiroomi. It was something that he thought was natural. He would be with him, not because he had decided about this long ago, but because the more he thought of Hiroomi the more he thought of wanting to be with him like it was something that was meant to happen.

Every time he thought of Mirai, he thought of the warmth of Hiroomi's touch the very first time they held hands. He thought of the way the little version of Hiroomi clasped his hands tightly as he pouted,

"What if we don't match?

Akkey cleared his throat and shuffled on the bed. What would happen to both of them now?


	2. Chapter 2

_"Akkey, the pain still won't go away."_

 _Akkey covered Hiroomi's wound with his cupped hands. It hovered a little bit above the scraped flesh. As if summoning every power inside of him, Akihito made a whisking action to make the pain go away._

 _"Pain, pain go away!" He almost screamed._

 _"Are you sure this will work?"_

 _"It will!"_

 _When Hiroomi still looked pained, Akihito dragged him inside the house. They went inside Hiroomi's room and sat on the bed. Akihito thought it would be better to be inside in order to throw the pain away. He cupped Hiroomi's knees again and then made a whisking action._

 _"Pain, pain go away!"_

 _"What now Akkey? It still hurts."_

 _Giving up after a lot of tries, Akihito lay down on the bed, arms spread and face looking up at the ceiling. He thought purposely, then turned to Hiroomi's side and smiled brightly. Hiroomi sighed and lay down beside him._

 _"Here let me hold your hand until the pain goes away!"_

 _Without waiting for an answer, Akihito twined their fingers together. It made Hiroomi fluster. Even though it was embarassing, he still held Akkey's hand tightly._

 _Silence settled between the two. It made the sound of Akkey's breathing too loud in Hiroomi's ears. It made Hiroomi think about Akkey's predicament, being half-human half youmo, and the fact that many didn't want him to exist._

 _"Akkey. I'll protect you. We'll be together forever wouldn't we?"_

 _"Mm."_

 _Akihito held Hiroomi's hand tightly in assent. After a while, both fell asleep holding each other's hand._

Hiroomi woke up exhausted. He didn't know why of all things, he dreamt of the past again. Shrugging these thoughts off, he prepared for school and decided that he would attend club activities. He didn't really have that much things to do, and it's not like he has friends to hang out with after school either. Attending club activities after being absent for a long time would be a change of pace for him.

Sauntering towards their club room, Hiroomi observed that it was rather lively. He opened the door and was surprised to see someone unfamiliar.

"Oh Hiroomi!" Akihito greeted him nonchalantly. Hiroomi flitted his eyes towards the girl and stared at her closely.

"A new recruit?"

"Yes, she's a transferee. It looks like she's also a spirit world warrior."

"Eh? Isn't that nice! And she's so your type Akkey. Glasses and all. Ah! She also has the little sister vibe. Lucky!"

Mitsuki made a face.

"Gross,"

"Mitsuki!!!" While Hiroomi was about to attempt to embrace his sister, he caught a glimpse of a two shiny things coming from Akkey and Mirai's palm, as if both of them were holding a packet of light. Hiroomi turned to it; eyes wide with surprise. Mitsuki noticed the change in his behavior.

"Nii-san, this is.."

"Soulmates huh? Good for them then,"

Mitsuki could see pain in her brother's face even though he was smiling.

"Akkey, you didn't tell me you already found your soulmate! That is unfair." Hiroomi whined.

Akihito frooze.

"You look so cute together! It's like a dream come true Akkey. Who would have thought you'd actually get a cute girl in glasses as your soulmate!" Hiroomi patted Akihito hard on the shoulder.

"Lucky you!"

Akihito smiled painfully.

"Hiroomi.."

"Ah, it's getting hot in here. Be right back, I'll go get us all some refreshment!"

Hiroomi went outside in a rush, leaving Mirai and everyone else in the room quite surprised. Mirai noticed the sudden change in the mood.

"What's wrong senpai?"

Mitsuki stole glances at Akihito. She sighed.

"Akihito, why don't you go help nii-san buy refreshments? We need to decide which stories to include in the anthology, make sure that wasn't an excuse to escape club activities."

"Okay."

Akihito searched for Hiroomi at the nearest vending machine but he didn't find him. He went to look for him near the gym and finally found him carrying their drinks. There were a lot so he ran towards him.

"Here let me carry some of it. Why did you buy a lot? There are only four of us in the clubroom you idiot!"

"Ah yes, I forgot."

"What's wrong Hiroomi?"

"Nothing. I'm just quite surprised."

"I know. It surprised me too. The person who's supposed to be my soulmate just tried to kill me. Isn't that funny?"

"She tried to kill you?" Hiroomi burst out laughing.

"Why would she? That's quite mental."

"I know right? It is."

Akihito stared at Hiroomi as they walked. It was as if he wanted to say something that he couldn't say. He looked so troubled that Hiroomi wondered why he made such a face.

"What is it Akkey? Why are you staring at me like that?"

"Nothing. Nothing."

They went back to the clubroom in silence.

"I saw Hiroomi-senpai with some first year boy." Mirai said nervously while they were at the club room.

"What?" Mitsuki replied, her eyes narrowing in diression.

"Is he bullying someone?"

"No. NO.. The air between the two's like.. It's unpleasant." Mirai imagined pink fluffy things hovering around Hiroomi and the first year student and made a disgusted face.

Akihito, who was sitting at the corner of the room, pretended that he was engrossed in the book he was reading.

"I always thought Hiroomi-senpai was into…"

Mirai stole a glance at Akkey. Mitsuki frowned, noticing Mirai's glance.

"That idiot Onii-san. He's just playing around probably. Maybe he's extorting that first year."

Unable to take the others' conversation, Akkey excused himself and went out of the room.

The afternoon sun was about to set when Akihito went out. He was walking in the hallway thinking about what Mirai said.

Hiroomi with a first year? Well He is popular.

Akkey's eyes drifted towards the window. There he saw Hiroomi chatting with a boy. It made him curious why Hiroomi was serious as he was talking to the person. Before he knew it, he rushed just to follow the two.

"Please go out with me Senpai."

Akihito hid near a bush, trying hard to cover himself up so that he won't be caught eavesdropping. When he heard what the first year student said, he was shocked.

"Eeeeh? So you like me."

"Yes, I like you very much senpai."

"You won't get anything from me though. I don't like you. Nor am I interested in going with uncool dates with someone younger than me. And a guy at that."

"I'll try my best. So please, if you'd like, please try going out with me."

Akihito wanted to see what face Hiroomi made, but he couldn't move.

"Ma, alright~

The response surprised Akkey. Dumbfounded, he poked his head out to see what happened to the two to be quiet all of a sudden. Then he saw Hiroomi pull the first year by the lapel to kiss him on the mouth.

Akihito's eyes grew wide. He felt something sting in his chest at the sight that he saw.

Inside the clubroom, everyone was busy reading through early editions of their anthology. Mirai was distracted. She thought about what she saw. Unable to stop herself, she finally had the courage to say something.

"Hiroomi-senpai! I… I saw you with a first year student earlier today." Mirai stuttered, adjusting her glasses, all stiff and lovably awkward.

Hiroomi just stared at her dumbfounded. He never knew that this could be a hot topic to the others.

"Why don't you invite him over to our club room niisan?" Mitsuki said, testing her brother; testing Akihito who looked troubled. Haughty, she was expecting Akkey to pick up what she was trying to say.

"Nah, I don't wanna~"

Hiroomi pouted. He glanced at Akkey who was beside him, silent. He edged closer to him and elbowed him on the side.

"What's wrong Akkey? Why do you look like you just ate something bitter?"

Akihito didn't feel like retorting something.

Mitsuki and Mirai looked at the two as they talked. Somehow, it looked like they had a world on their own. It made Mirai feel like an outsider. She bit her lip and bowed her head. Mitsuki, noticing the change in Mirai, tried to talk to her about random things.

Akihito lay in bed unable to sleep.

He stared at the ceiling to figure things out. It was the only thing he could do. Whenever he closed his eyes, he would see the kiss again. It made his heart ache. What did it mean?

Why hurt in the first place? It was bothersome.

There was a sound that came from his window. He sighed, stood up, and went to it to check. Opening the window, he saw Hiroomi outside wrapped up in his indoor clothes—just a jacket and jogging pants with a scarf around his neck to keep him from the cold—enthusiastically waving up at him. For some reason, seeing him made Akihito feel quite happy. It felt like the questions that had been bugging him didn't matter; that the answer to them was just simple. And it was Hiroomi coming to him like this. It was them finally fixing their relationship. He hid a smile, and went downstairs to welcome Hiroomi. It was hard holding himself back from rushing to the raven haired boy.

"Why are you here again?"

"I ran away from home." Hiroomi said as he was taking off his jacket, as though running away from home was something normal.

"What?!"

"I was just kidding, silly."

"You sure it's alright to take off your jacket? Aren't you cold?"

"Nah, you're here. I won't get cold." Hiroomi winked and flashed a playful smile.

"Oh, I bought food. Stop eating omurice."

That made Akihito smile. It was just like they went back to how they were before. Before he hurt Hiroomi.

Pleased, Akihito gazed at Hiroomi. He stared at him like a love struck fool as the other hanged his jacket and put away his shoes on the shoe rack.

The clinking sound of the utensils was the only thing that made noise. Both were quietly eating the food that Hiroomi brought. He brought take out ramen. The smell of the ramen wafted in the air making Akihito feel like he was in heaven. The taste of the warm broth in his mouth and the noodle pleased his stomach. He ate heartily. He didn't notice Hiroomi stealing glances at him. The raven-haired boy was flustered and happy at his enthusiasm.

"Akkey~ slow down or else you're gonna choke you know."

Akihito pouted and mumbled something. Hiroomi smiled at him as he sipped on his ramen. His stomach clenched at the thought that both of them were alone in this moment together. He clenched his toes and concentrated on his food. It had been so long since they were together like this. It's been a long time since they were alone. Friends. Happy.

If it was possible, he didn't want this to end.

Akihito just finished using the bath. They were about to go to sleep. He was nervous. Maybe being with someone you hold dear felt this awkward and exciting. Maybe he was excited because finally he was able to have a normal conversation with Hiroomi. They were finally able to talk like how they used to, or at least like how they used to. Everything just forced him to think of the past and how it all changed and got mended.

When they were young, he often slept with Hiroomi like this. Thinking of it always made Akihito smile. He closed his eyes and listened to the sound of rushing water. The sound was a reminder that Hiroomi was going to spend the night at his house. They were going to be alone together for the first time in a long time. Even though he was happy, it made him feel conflicted. His thoughts settled on Mirai and the soulmarks. He thought about how sometimes destiny made things more complicated rather than easier. If the effect of the soulmarks are a physical thing, can it be escaped? Were they bound to follow it just because fate dictated it?

Thinking of such things, he fell asleep.

Hiroomi felt quite excited like a high school girl staying at his boyfriend's house for the first time. In the past, it was always Akihito spending the night in Hiroomi's room, not the other way around. He stared at Akkey's bath and thought that it was just plain and ordinary. It was the typical bath for an apartment. Since he didn't bring a towel with him, Akihito let him borrow a towel. When he was done bathing, rather than wipe himself, instead, he buried his face on the towel and inhaled its scent.

It was a nostalgic smell. Hiroomi crumpled the towel in his hands and breathed the scent in. Again and again. He chanted sorry in his head as he continued to smell the towel.

Remembering the first year kid, he wondered whether Akkey knew about their relationship, and if he did, what did he thought? Thinking made Hiroomi nervous so he decided to get a hold of himself and went out of the bath.

A sleeping Akihito greeted Hiroomi when he entered the room. He almost giggled at the sight. Hiroomi had forgotten how Akihito looked when he slept. Seeing him fast asleep, mouth parted a bit, he blushed as he stared. Hiroomi tiptoed and crouched at the foot of the bed and gazed at Akkey's sleeping face. He leaned in, crossed his arms on the bed and perched his head on his arms. Gazing at Akkey's sleeping face was a treat. It made him want to say the things he really wanted to say to him because he wouldn't be able to hear them after all. Confessing to a person who is asleep maybe be liberating. At least you've said what you wanted to say, but it is not liberation in its true sense. It is not confronting what one really feels, rather, it is no different from running away.

There is fear in a feeling such as this. Hiroomi knew this very well. He wasn't experienced with relationships and love. Falling in love with someone of the same sex is not really something he thought seriously about. Because to him, the gender didn't matter. The truth was, he was just afraid of falling in love with his friend. And so, he is stuck in this hesitation.

"Akkey." Hiroomi whispered as he gazed at Akkey's face.

When he realized he had feelings for Akihito, he stopped staring at him, afraid that he would know that he had so much power over him. Now, he was free to look as much as he could. There was no fear of being judged. There was no fear of being rejected. There was no guilt whatsoever.

It's just him faced with his feelings.

More than four hundred days of not talking made him quite sad. He didn't want to admit to himself that he had always enjoyed Akihito's company. He didn't want to admit to himself that it hurt him when he knew he and Akkey didn't match; that they were not soulmates; that they were not for each other.

He tried to hold back whatever he felt ever since his soulmark appeared. Yes, he was excited for the possibility that they would match. He looked forward to the time when they meet again and their soulmarks would glow as they recognize that indeed they were meant to be. That's why when he knew they didn't match, he was disappointed, frustrated. When you have been expecting something so much, the pain caused by its frustration is a physical torment. Hiroomi did not yet accept this fact. But he has too or he will never be happy again. He thought of a lot of things to move on. But it only got him to where he started--being with Akihito, longing for him no matter how lost a cause it is. Being close to Akihito like this made his longing stronger. The emotions he bottled up inside just spilled out. It drove him to rise from where he sat and kiss Akkey on the mouth.

Kissing Akihito was unlike kissing the first year student he went out with. When he kissed the other, he wasn't as nervous as he was with Akkey. He didn't feel this hotness in his body. There was no weakness in the legs and breathlessness.

So this was how it felt to finally kiss the one you truly love.

Akihito's lips were soft against his own. It was warm and it made Hiroomi feel like he was in heaven. When he withdrew he was shy. He wanted to touch him more. He wanted to be touched and be kissed deeply just like the kiss that he shared with the first year boy. Feeling embarrassed, Hiroomi creased his eyebrows and woke Akihito up so that he could sleep properly.

Half-asleep, Akihito sat up in bed, yawned, and rubbed his eyes. He was about to stand up and sleep on the sofa. Hiroomi, eyes wide pulled him and pushed him down on the bed.

"Idiot just sleep here. You're too sleepy to function."

Akihito's sight was blurry. He didn't see Hiroomi's flustered face clearly. When his vision cleared, and his mind sobered, he was surprised. He rose and bumped his head against Hiroomi's. Hiroomi curled up, and cried from the pain.

"Idiot! It hurts."

"I'm sorry! I didn't mean it Hiroomi."

Akihito went to get something to put on Hiroomi's forehead.

"Does it still hurt?"

"Of course you idiot! Why'd you have to do that, stupid. Now I can't go to school with this face."

"Stop whining, and who told you to be on top of me?"

At that Hiroomi blushed even redder. Feeling embarrassed, the two went silent. Unable to take the silence, Akihito sighed. He lied down beside Hiroomi and stared at the ceiling. Their hands were close on the bed. Akihito felt their closeness. It made him feel nervous and afraid of what this could mean. Of what his feelings could mean.

Hiroomi on the other hand, was breathless beside him. He didn't know what to do. He didn't know what to say to him. All he knew was Akkey was too close for comfort. Akkey was a warm body next to him, and he was cold. He closed his eyes and scooted closer to Akkey. Hiroomi can never resist Akkey's warmth. He wrapped his arm around Akkey's arm and leaned on his shoulders.

Akihito turned his head to the side.

"You're so warm Akkey." Hiroomi melted.

"So very warm."

They both looked like lovers spending their last night together. This part was the part where Akihito would pull away from Hiroomi. Hiroomi waited for the rejection, but it never came. Akkey leaned in, turned to his side and scooted closer to him. He pulled the blankets and tucked the two of them together. And just like that they both fell asleep holding each other.

The night they spent together felt distant, so remote, like a dream. Beautiful things don't last, as do things that make one happy. Happiness is a constant search. Akihito knew this well. As he stared into the distance, with book in hand, he realized that maybe he should give up. The universe has spoken. What is not meant to be will never be meant to be.

Mitsuki noticed that Akihito's thoughts drifted far away.

The two were alone in the club room. Mirai had something to do, so it was just the two of them. The fact that Hiroomi and Akihito cared for each had always been on Mitsuki's mind. Today too, she thought of it. She thought that maybe sometimes love is not enough to bring two people together. But she could still try.

"That guy nii-san is seeing is not his soulmate." She blurted out.

Akihito was surprised.

"Why are you telling me this?"

Embarrassed, Mitsuki couldn't help but feel stupid. Akihito had no idea that she always thought about this. Acting like her efforts were irrelevant hurt. She clenched her fists and bit her lip. She wished that Akkey wouldn't hear how loudly her heart was beating inside her chest.

She knew all to well the pain of loving someone who doesn't love you back and the happiness of the slight possibility of an "us".

If things were different would he still feel the same? Mitsuki wondered about Akihito's feelings.

"Akihito.."

"What will you do if ..."

"What?"

"What if we didn't have this soul mark thing? Would you.." Her voice came out desperate.

"Silly. Why are you asking me things like this? This is so unlike you."

"It's not like I'm interested in whatever you're gonna say, so.." Mitsuki retorted defensively; trying to find a way out from showing how she felt.

Akkey responded with a sad smile.

Angry, Mitsuki continued,

"What if this is just to make sure we each have pairs? What if this does not really mean we have to be with our soulmates?"

When Akihito only smiled at her awkwardly, as if he was saying, "It wouldn't matter" she grimaced.

"Akihito,.. You are an idiot."

And just like that, she left.

Hiroomi lied on his bed. Panels of light cut through his window, dapling on his figure. He turned to his side and saw that there was no one beside him. There was no Akihito. It reminded him that it had been weeks since the night they spent with each other. Now his feelings for him only got worse. And he didn't have any idea what to do. He didn't try to see Akihito, fearing that he won't be able to keep his heart from being so loud when they meet. To keep thoughts of Akkey away, he was busying himself learning things about his boyfriend. He learned that he liked being in control. Every time they kissed it was always a prelude to love making.

The first time Hiroomi had sex, he thought that his heart was going to explode. He never thought it was like that: the union of the bodies and the union of the souls. Yet, Everytime he kissed the boy, he would imagine that it was Akkey who was kissing him. Everytime they do it, he would fantasize that it was Akihito that held him.

As time went by, Hiroomi realized that It was difficult being with someone who you don't love. And so, he ended his relationship with the boy, thinking that it was for the best.

Akihito overdid himself.

Hiroomi had to stop him again from going berserk. He had to force himself to be cold hearted as he subdued him. Mirai freaked out as Akihito turned into a monster right before her very eyes. She blamed herself for what happened. She thought it was her fault that Akihito turned into a monster.

The first thing Akihito felt when he regained consciousness was body pain. He groaned, sat up in bed and looked at his hands. What happened before everything went black all came back to him.

He creased his eyebrows and slumped back on the bed. Hearing the sound of footsteps getting close to his room, he didn't want to think about who it was. The pattering made him nervous. To fend off his anxiety, he turned his back, pulled his blanket and wrapped his whole body with it. He was afraid to know about the consequences of his actions.

A click on the door made his thoughts disappear.

"What's wrong?"

The voice was Hiroomi's. Instead of replying, he bit his lip. He curled up. Hiroomi quirked his eyebrows, sauntered towards the bed and sat near Akihito's side. Hiroomi wanted to touch him, but he stopped himself from doing so. He knew the blond was hurting. He partly blamed himself for not being able to protect him.

Hiroomi didn't like it when Akkey hurt.

"Why the long face? It's such a wonderful night for a festival isn't it? Come let's go."

"I don't wanna."

"Akkey~ stop feeling sorry for yourself and let's just enjoy the night shall we? I bought you some clothes."

"I don't want to go Hiroomi. If you want, you can go by yourself."

"Nah, it won't be the same without you. Let's go? There'll be fireworks and stuff.

"If you don't go, then I won't go and you'll suffer trying to keep me company." Hiroomi slumped on the bed, slipped his hands on Akkey's waists and moaned.

"Ah, so warm. Akkey~ you're a treasure!"

Akihito realized that it was better to appease Hiroomi than be stuck with him. And so, he agreed to go with him to the festival. They saw Mitsuki and Mirai there.

He paused. It felt like he just saw something heavenly. Mirai wore a cute yukata. Her hair was styled with a braid. Seeing her made Akkey's heart skip a beat. Their soulmarks glowed as Akihito tried to stop Hiroomi from wiggling his hands on his waist. Relief enveloped his heart just gazing at her. She was cute, innocent, and looked good in glasses. He was thankful that despite his flaws he still had someone that was meant for him in this world. Akihito smiled and went to Mirai, leaving Hiroomi.

Hiroomi just stared at both of them pretending he wasn't bothered by Akkey's leaving.

The night sky was beautiful with all the stars spread out in its expanse. Mirai and Akihito were standing alone together gazing at it as the light from the lanterns dappled on them. Akkey felt awkward. He thought about what happened. He thought about what Mirai might think about him going berserk; about her finally finding out what he truly was--a monster. Akkey clenched his hands into fists. It always made him feel like all he brings to those around him is just pain and suffering. All he brings them are sadness and danger.

"Senpai?" Mirai asked, noticing how troubled he was.

Akkey only smiled awkwardly.

"I'm sorry earlier. You didn't have to see that."

"It's fine senpai."

What happened made Mirai realized why Akkey couldn't leave her alone. They were alike. And that made her feel closer to him. She felt calm beside Akihito. For the first time, she felt like there was some place where she belonged, and that there was someone who truly cared for her. They watched the lanterns together and waited for the fireworks display when Mirai remembered something.

"Senpai, excuse me. I need to go somewhere." She didn't actually want to leave. But it couldn't be helped. She bid him goodbye wryly. Akkey smiled at her and waved goodbye.

Being alone never bothered Akkey. Instead of lamenting about how he's alone, he went to find a spot where he could watch the fireworks by himself. When he finally found a spot near a block of stone, he sat on the bench and waited. Mitsuki saw him. Blushing, she was about to approach him when she saw her brother standing far away, looking hesitant to approach Akkey. She looked down at her feet, quirked her eyebrows in frustration. She bit her lip, clenched her hands, and then turned around.

She understood even if it hurts.

"Why are you alone?" Hiroomi asked Akihito, surprised that he wasn't with Mirai.

"She went to see someone. She told me it was important."

Hiroomi sat beside Akihito.

"Really? The fireworks display is going to start."

"Yeah. It can't be helped though."

"Ne Akkey,"

"What?"

Hiroomi gazed into Akihito's face dappled by yellow light from the lanterns. Akkey turned to him, and gazed into his eyes. It surprised him so he looked away and scooted away from Akihito. He needed to put some distance between the two of them. It was for his own good.

In response to Hiroomi's odd behavior, Akihito moved closer. One of Akihito's quirks was sometimes he wasn't aware of his surroundings. He wasn't aware that Hiroomi was nervous around him. As their hands brushed, Hiroomi trembled. Anticipating something more to the touch, Hiroomi wanted to lean on his shoulder, but when he saw Akihito's sad expression, softness spread in his heart. He pulled him in and allowed him to lean on his shoulder instead.

"I am your senpai, stop making strange facial expressions! You can tell me whatever you want. Even your love problems. I'll listen to it all Akkey~" Hiroomi said pleased with himself when actually he was very nervous that his fingers held little earthquakes at their tips.

Hiroomi knew Akihito felt guilty about what happened.

"It's not your fault Akkey."

"What if I hurt someone again?

"I don't want to hurt anyone again."

"It's fine. You did it to save her."

"But.."

"You know I'll always have your back, so don't worry! I told you I would be the best spirit world warrior for you." Hiroomi smiled playfully.

"Hiroomi…" Akkey held his hand affectionately for the first time in years. Hiroomi was surprised that he almost slapped his hand away. He couldn't move. When Akkey raised his head to him, it felt like an arrow just shot right through his heart.

"Thank you."

Akkey squeezed his hand. He squeezed it like he didn't want to let go; that he was glad Hiroomi was there for him. Hiroomi smiled knowing that nothing was behind the touch, merely gratitude. Hiroomi squeezed his hand back. It felt like they returned to the past. It felt like they were kids again, alone together holding each other's hand.

When Akkey held Hiroomi's hand, nostalgia gave him a surge of emotions. He was reminded that after everything, he still wanted Hiroomi to be his soulmate. After everything he still wanted them to be together. He knew that he was with someone now. The jealousy he tried so hard to stop, and the love he tried to hard to forget all came rushing back to him.

He gazed at him. As the breeze brushed his skin, he wanted so much to embrace Hiroomi. He wanted to say something to Hiroomi. He wanted to tell him, "Do you still want to be with me?" but rather say anything, without thinking, he leaned in.

Both didn't hear the wail of the firecracker from a distance. They didn't hear the burst nor see the fireworks bloom in the night sky. They were only conscious of the warm thing on their mouths.

Akihito never kissed anyone in his entire life. He didn't know that sometimes, there is an urge to just kiss someone. When he looked at Hiroomi and felt everything all at once, his body acted on its own.

He kissed him.

As he sloshed his lips against Hiroomi's, he felt as if he was blazing from the inside. It was a new sensation to him.

It made him think that maybe there is a heaven in someone's mouth.

Hiroomi was too shaken to move because of the kiss. Akkey left him wide eyed and unable to breathe. The kiss was abrupt, just like the kiss that he stole when Akkey was asleep. It had a tenderness to it, like a goodbye kiss, as if Akkey was saying sorry to him. When Akkey withdrew, he wanted to hold him, pull him again to kiss him once more. What was a kiss when it was not long enough to make the person realize what you really feel?

He felt like he was about to cry. At the moment their lips meet everything just settled in its place and there was room for two mismatched people in love. Yet he couldn't do anything to maintain it. As he froze in shock, Akihito felt guilty. He excused himself and left Hiroomi wide eyed with a question hanging from his lips.

Mirai realized that if there was something that she didn't want, it was killing Akkey. She began to like him, not because he was her soulmate, but because he was kind.

If it was Akkey, she didn't mind whatever consequence that await her. Because of him, she began opening up to others; she began being friends with them. Akihito made her learn a lot of things. She was grateful for Mitsuki too, and the others. So far she was enjoying her stay with them. She enjoyed the idol performance that they made just to capture the youmo. Being with them felt like she finally had a place where she belonged. For someone who felt like she was a burden, she had a hard time processing this. She didn't want to lose someone she held dear again. That's why, she decided, that this time around she wouldn't make the same mistake. this time, She would protect what was important to her.

Hiroomi didn't know what to do.

The calm came, and as a consequence, Akkey was in a coma. Hiroomi was starting to lose it. The feelings that he buried inside of him swelled and made itself present now that Akkey is on the verge of death. He regreted the fact that he couldn't say "I love you" to him properly. He regreted holding back. Now that it's too late, he realized that despite everything he still loved Akkey. Mitsuki could only observe how much he freaked out. How much, if he'd like, to beg God to keep Akkey alive.

Akkey woke up after months of being unconscious. The first thought that came to him was Mirai.

Where was she? He wanted to see her.

Hiroomi and Mitsuki accompanied him to eat at AI's, but Akihito insisted on wanting to see Mirai. He wanted to go to the raging portal above their town to find her. Hiroomi was pissed off.

Akkey was selfish. Akkey never truly cared about his feelings. He never considered how Hiroomi felt waiting for him to wake up without any guarantee of him actually waking.

It pained Hiroomi but he couldn't do anything to stop Akihito. Of course he would like to be with Mirai because they were soulmates. It was only natural.

When everything was said and done, when their powers were no more, and the calm was no longer a threat, Hiroomi left, leaving only the trundle of the train in his wake as a form of goodbye.


End file.
